Thursday, June 08, 2006

Big Blogger 2 - Task 6, 6/06

Once again, I'm squeaking in at the deadline... but this time I have an (almost plausible) excuse! I've been researching my post thoroughly (at Maxine's Tavern) so as to present the fullest picture of the conspiracy among us.

While Big Rachy had tasked us with uncovering a new urban legend this week, I decided to go her one better and uncover an urban TRUTH! So today i unveil to you all the result of my week of hard work and dilligent reporting:

Cops hate orange trucks.

Just think about it... how many orange trucks do you see people driving around town? Not many at all, because most of them have been impounded or destroyed. In the past, it was primarily average citizens who bore the brunt of this harassment, but in recent years, the fascist forces of orange truckism have set their sights on bigger targets. SWEPCO, A large electricity provider in the southern US, used to have massive fleets of orange trucks swarming all over the region, keeping people happily electrified... util the orange truckists rolled into town. Now those orange trucks are a fading memory, and the company is no more.

I know what you're saying to yourself out there. "Self, ol Stew has done flipped his lid." Well Commentor Dan, the only lids I've flipped are my EYELIDS, because they are wide open and I am seeing the truth at last! But I'm just one person, and I don't have the resources or clout to fight the powers that be. I had thought to make sure that my next vehicle purchase would be an orange truck, but convienently enough, it turns out the manufacturer has discontinued orange as a color option.

So the next time you see an orange truck on the street, take extra precaution. You don't know how many cops are lying in wait for the unsuspecting trucker, or what lengths they'll go to in order to exact their cruel revenge.

----The Rest of The Usual Suspects:
The Rachy
Hillbilly Mom
Redneck Diva
and the interloper, Doctor Evil

----Previous Big Blogger 2 posts:
Theyyyyyyyy're Mediocre!
Infectious Grooves
The Shame of the Monkeybars
Roses Have Thorns: The Kleenex Box Ode
Abe Dawg's playing poker
Postcards From the Hedge
Your Friendly Neighborhood Asshole


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