Shot through the heart, and you're to blame!

I was recently sent this tasty item that demanded to be included in the annals of Big Dumb Sheep. Thanks go out to my loyal reader for keeping me informed of crazy shit like this.

I must've been caught up in Thanksgiving festivities to notice this one, and I apologize for letting you all down. Anyway, This is -- without a doubt -- proof positive that God hates hippies.

My favorite part about this is the police quote at the end, where they specifically had to mention that Lance Armstrong's retarded doppleganger was neither drunk nor high when he submitted his candidacy for the Darwin Awards. For the sake of society at large, his daughter needs to be submitted to a comprehensive battery of testing to determine if she should be put down now, and save us all the expense of raising her just so she can follow in her father's footsteps.
Of course, if she's a chip off the ol' block, it'll be fucking hilarious when she snuffs herself.

What the hell, go for it kid! Keep the streak alive!